What better way to spend your baby's 1st birthday than to relive it by telling his birth story. Of course that means the tears are flowing as I look back through photos and relive that day one year ago. So here it goes...straight from my journal, because let's be honest, there is no way I could remember all of those details a year later!
*This is long and probably too much info for some, but this story is also for me to look back on and remember every.little.detail. I told Dustin that because so much is a complete blur to me with Christian, I want every moment documented. The good and the ugly.*
The morning of March 14th, 2014, Dustin and I woke up at the ridiculous hour of 3:30am to head to the hospital for my scheduled c-section. My original plan had been to go into labor on my own and attempt a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), but Gavin was nice and cozy. He was measuring large, so the doctor didn't want to wait too much longer, and because I was a VBAC, an induction was risky. So since he wasn't coming out on his own, the plan was to go in and get him.
I was definitely nervous. My first birth was not a good experience. He came 2 weeks early and ended up in an emergency c-section, for which I was put under. I didn't meet him for about an hour after he was born and even that memory is very fuzzy. I had a lot of comfort that this time would be better because I would actually be awake for the surgery & get to meet him immediately.
However, I was also very disappointed that I wasn't going to attempt to delivery him the ole' fashioned way. I SO wanted that birth experience and it was an emotional morning for me to say the least. BUT, off to the hospital we went for pre-surgery meds & prep.
They got me all hooked up and my IV started around 6am. Nothing to do but wait now, as my surgery was scheduled for 7:30am.
At 7am, the anesthesiologist came in to talk to me. Followed by more nurses and then finally my doctor. And this is where our entire day completely shifted...
Dr. B: "Good morning! Are you ready?"
Me: As ready as I can be!
Dr. B: "And you're sure you don't want to try for the VBAC?"
Me: *Looking at her with a completely bewildered look on my face* "Uhhh..."
Dr. B: Because I can break your water and start you on low dose Pitocin right now.
At this moment, I was in complete shock and had NO idea what to do. I knew that induction with a VBAC upped the risks of a uterine rupture. But my doctor seemed so confident this wouldn't be an issue. I asked her again what the risks were and she told me that with a complete induction, the risk is higher, but because I was already contracting, she would just put me on a "whiff of pit" as she called it, which is just enough Pitocin to jump start my labor process.
I felt on the spot, helpless and clueless. I told her no, we would stick with our surgery. Before she left the room, she turned around and asked, "Are you sure? I know how badly you want this." I very unsurely, said yes, I'm sure.
7:25am.
The nurse came to wheel me back to surgery and I was a hot mess. She asked if I was okay. I told her not really, because the doctor had just come in and put doubt in our minds about the surgery. When she asked what we meant, I told her what had happened. Her response? "Oh, well I love doing VBAC's! They're my favorite!" Hm. Now even the nurse is on board with this option. I told her we needed another minute before we went back, and she said she would send the doctor back in just in case we have any more questions.
When Dr. B came back in, she talked more to us about the whole process, and finally Dustin stepped in and said "Let's do it. I know how much you want this."
So that was it. My scheduled c-section was off and I was going to attempt a regular labor & delivery process. I was suddenly so nervous. What if there was a complication? What if I was the 1% that ended up with a rupture? What if my epidural doesn't work again? What if I end up needing another c-section and they have to put me under again?
The nurse came back in and was beyond excited. Dr. B came back in and was even more excited than her. She reassured me over and over. She loves doing VBACs. I could do this. And she would be with me every step of the way. This WILL work.
At 8am, they started me on my low dose of Pitocin. I was contracting, but I honestly couldn't feel them yet. She broke my water at 8:30am.
I did really good with the contractions until around 10am. After that, we kicked everyone out of the room because they were pretty intense. I was trying to put the epidural off as long as possible because I was so nervous it wasn't going to work again. And it also caused my blood pressure to bottom out the first time. That was fun.
I labored as long as I could until 1pm until I finally threw in the towel.
I got my epidural at 1:30pm. It made me nauseous at first, but if I sat up or laid on my left side, the nausea went away. My doctor checked my progress and I had made it to 4cm.
Things progressed pretty slowly from here & I was starving. They finally obliged and let me have ice cream & broth around 3pm. I took a nap. I had several visitors that helped keep my mind occupied.
Around 6pm, I started feeling kind of off. She checked me and I was only at 5cm. I was also pretty sure I had a fever, and my right side was starting to regain some feeling. They told me I needed to switch sides in order for the epidural to keep both sides numb...but every time I moved to my right side, my blood pressure would start dropping and I would get extremely nauseous. My body apparently just hates epidurals.
She checked my temp, and I was definitely running a fever. My heart rate also started fluctuating like crazy. Now it was operation get my fever under control. They gave me Tylenol and had Dustin rotate cool wash clothes on my face and feet. They also put me on oxygen to keep my heart rate steady.
As of 7pm, my fever was at 101.4. They gave me antibiotics and more cold compresses.
At 8:30, it was at 101.9. More cold compresses. Dustin had his work cut out for him!
My fever finally broke around 9:30pm. Now our only battle was to get my epidural evened out, but I was starting to really feel the contractions on my right side.
At 10:20, she checked me and I was at 6cm. At this point she told me to try and get some rest, because it would probably be a few more hours. I slept for about 30 minutes and woke up to some intense pressure. I asked them to call the nurse in to check me (which I'm sure they rolled their eyes at...they had just checked me 30 minutes ago). I was 9cm! Well look at that, in 30 minutes I had dilated a whole 3 cm!
They started getting the room ready and paged Dr. B. The pressure was getting really intense, and I kept telling Dustin that I needed to push.
At 11:40, I was at 10cm and ready to go.
The pushing was exhausting. Obviously. It's called labor for a reason. At 11:45, I somewhat jokingly asked Dr. B if she thought I would have this baby today. I really wanted March 14th as a birthday! She turned around to look at the clock, laughed and said, "I don't think so."
Well, apparently you tell me I can't do something and I will prove you wrong. At 11:55, I pushed my final push and suddenly there was a baby on my chest. A chubby, purple, not breathing or crying baby. Dustin cut the cord and the nurses worked their magic to get his first cry.
They cleaned him off and stuck him on my chest for skin-to-skin kangaroo care. Talk about emotions.
I kept looking at Dustin and telling him, "We did it! I can't believe we did it!" I never thought I would get this experience and let me tell you, it was beyond what Dustin and I could ever imagine.
After I baby hogged him for 2 hours, Dustin finally got to hold him.
Then it was off to the nursery for check-ups. Gavin measured in at 8lbs, 3oz & 20.5inches long.
And suddenly, we were brand new parents again. And by suddenly, I mean 18 months of infertility, 40 weeks and 4 days of pregnancy, and 17 hours of labor. ;)
It was a long night after that. I was adamant that he never leave my side, but I hadn't slept in 24 hours and the nurse gave me strict orders to get some rest.
They brought him back in to me around 5am and that was it. I was completely and totally head over heels.
The next few days were a hospital blur of friends and family visitors, doctors, nurses & most importantly...big brother meeting little brother.
He was unsure at first, but as soon as he learned Gavin had new toys for him, he was won over. ;)
So that's it. Our journey to bring the feistiest, craziest, sweetest little redhead into the world. We couldn't be more in love with him, even a year later.
Happy Birthday, Gavin Lee. You're everything we hoped for and more.
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